I feel heavy today, not physically heavy, but burdened with a heavy feeling. Some things around me are affecting my mood: friends who have been falsely accused of abusing their children & are fighting to get them back, friends who can’t have a baby, friends who were great parents & their son still committed suicide, a sinking feeling that things in the world are getting worse when I hear of new things closely lining up with prophecy I’ve read in the Bible, and, finally, knowing what to do with myself in my own life.
I’m not complaining, just sharing a plethora of thoughts adding up to a little cloud hovering over my head. At my church, we’re doing a study on Habakkuk & learning “the reply to why”. Basically why do bad things still happen to “good” people, etc., etc.? It’s so interesting how many times in the bible that God gets glory in the end through evil, like wiping out nations & just allowing things to happen. I’m not so naïve as to think He doesn’t allow these things. There’s so much I don’t know, but a few things I do know to be true: I know that we have victory in the end; I know that this is a fallen world; I know that Habakkuk cried out to God asking him why he tolerates the evil in Judah & God’s response was that he was raising up the Babylonians to take them over. Using evil to get rid of bad?!
I’m not complaining, just sharing a plethora of thoughts adding up to a little cloud hovering over my head. At my church, we’re doing a study on Habakkuk & learning “the reply to why”. Basically why do bad things still happen to “good” people, etc., etc.? It’s so interesting how many times in the bible that God gets glory in the end through evil, like wiping out nations & just allowing things to happen. I’m not so naïve as to think He doesn’t allow these things. There’s so much I don’t know, but a few things I do know to be true: I know that we have victory in the end; I know that this is a fallen world; I know that Habakkuk cried out to God asking him why he tolerates the evil in Judah & God’s response was that he was raising up the Babylonians to take them over. Using evil to get rid of bad?!
It doesn’t really make sense. But then I think – does it have to? I’m the kind of person who wants to understand everything, but when it comes to the ways of the Lord, I have to just make myself accept that I can’t always understand. So then what am I supposed to do now that I’ve accepted the fact that I don’t have to understand? I still strongly believe that I shouldn’t just be ok with everything that's happening. I want to be the kind of person that cries out to the Lord about the injustice I see surrounding me, to pray with boldness for answers. Our pastor made the interesting point that the cross is one of the worst torture devices in the history of man, used by one of the most corrupt governments in history, and ultimately that’s what gave me my salvation. Why do people walk around saying that God wouldn't allow terrorism or even worse natural disasters than we've already seen? Definitely something to chew on.
The first three things I listed that are on my mind have to do with children. Now, I don’t have children. I do desire them at some point in my life. Sometimes I almost think I wish I were in that stage now, but then I realize I’m not even close to being ready. Anyway, these problems & then the way the world is now really make me question whether I want to bring children into this world. Are they just going to be taken away from me? Will they take their own life after i've poured so much of mine into them? Am i fit to train up someone in the way they should go? What if they never accept Jesus as their savior? Will i be able to protect them? Will i be able to accept when situations are out of my control? I’m not losing sleep over it or anything, just something that crosses my mind every so often.
Ok one of the things that I started thinking about today in reference to the prophecy comment before is Oprah. I’ve seen some things recently about these new people she’s endorsing that are fairly new-agey & what I perceive to be lies disguised as feel-good truth. Anyway, one of the most alarming things is that the author of this book & supposed spiritual advisor to Oprah is head of this peace alliance, trying to start a U.S. Department of Peace. Now, peace sounds great. World peace sounds even greater, but when you get someone who is a proponent of “mind training” and a year-long self-study “course in miracles”, thinks we’re all destined to be as Jesus on one hand & that she’s a magical witch on the other, I have to start questioning. Oprah & another author are teaching a class online every Monday night to something like 2 million people. Oprah thinks that sharing this guy’s book is a fulfillment of her life’s purpose & the book is predicted to be the best-seller of all time. I guess we’ll see.
I saw another thing about this book called don’t drink the kool-aid. The title is a reference to an occult mass suicide in the 70s. This woman, a Christian author, is basically saying that this “Oprah movement” is occult-ish & that Oprah is reaching more people daily than most pastors will reach in a lifetime. She addresses Oprah’s endorsement of Obama and how it has given him an assent to power quicker than he ever would have gotten there alone as well as references the teachings I previously mentioned. My first inclination is to blindly believe everything this woman says, but then am I just as bad as the people I’m accusing of being deceived by blinding believing everything Oprah says?
Lastly, I just want to make the right decisions in my own life. I know that i can't be ok & make the right choices all the time, I do. I just desire the discernment for making the right decisions & the ability to accept & forgive myself when I don't, moving on to hopefully make the right one next time. I find myself making decisions of the moment as of late in an effort to not need to see the big picture, but be satisfied with the present. The result is a series of decisions that I’m not sure were right, but not sure if they were necessarily wrong. I want to bring glory to God. I also want to love & be loved. Emotions & rationalization can really get in the way of clear thinking.
I’m going to look up some of the prophecy I’m talking about so I can quote scripture next time instead of just a jumble of questions & general wonder-ing…ments (FRIENDS).
The first three things I listed that are on my mind have to do with children. Now, I don’t have children. I do desire them at some point in my life. Sometimes I almost think I wish I were in that stage now, but then I realize I’m not even close to being ready. Anyway, these problems & then the way the world is now really make me question whether I want to bring children into this world. Are they just going to be taken away from me? Will they take their own life after i've poured so much of mine into them? Am i fit to train up someone in the way they should go? What if they never accept Jesus as their savior? Will i be able to protect them? Will i be able to accept when situations are out of my control? I’m not losing sleep over it or anything, just something that crosses my mind every so often.
Ok one of the things that I started thinking about today in reference to the prophecy comment before is Oprah. I’ve seen some things recently about these new people she’s endorsing that are fairly new-agey & what I perceive to be lies disguised as feel-good truth. Anyway, one of the most alarming things is that the author of this book & supposed spiritual advisor to Oprah is head of this peace alliance, trying to start a U.S. Department of Peace. Now, peace sounds great. World peace sounds even greater, but when you get someone who is a proponent of “mind training” and a year-long self-study “course in miracles”, thinks we’re all destined to be as Jesus on one hand & that she’s a magical witch on the other, I have to start questioning. Oprah & another author are teaching a class online every Monday night to something like 2 million people. Oprah thinks that sharing this guy’s book is a fulfillment of her life’s purpose & the book is predicted to be the best-seller of all time. I guess we’ll see.
I saw another thing about this book called don’t drink the kool-aid. The title is a reference to an occult mass suicide in the 70s. This woman, a Christian author, is basically saying that this “Oprah movement” is occult-ish & that Oprah is reaching more people daily than most pastors will reach in a lifetime. She addresses Oprah’s endorsement of Obama and how it has given him an assent to power quicker than he ever would have gotten there alone as well as references the teachings I previously mentioned. My first inclination is to blindly believe everything this woman says, but then am I just as bad as the people I’m accusing of being deceived by blinding believing everything Oprah says?
Lastly, I just want to make the right decisions in my own life. I know that i can't be ok & make the right choices all the time, I do. I just desire the discernment for making the right decisions & the ability to accept & forgive myself when I don't, moving on to hopefully make the right one next time. I find myself making decisions of the moment as of late in an effort to not need to see the big picture, but be satisfied with the present. The result is a series of decisions that I’m not sure were right, but not sure if they were necessarily wrong. I want to bring glory to God. I also want to love & be loved. Emotions & rationalization can really get in the way of clear thinking.
I’m going to look up some of the prophecy I’m talking about so I can quote scripture next time instead of just a jumble of questions & general wonder-ing…ments (FRIENDS).
